What You’ll Need
- Short White Wig
- Red Rectangular Reading Glasses
- Black Cord Retainer Glasses Holder
- Camel Wool Top Coat
- Dark Green Turtleneck
- Tan Corduroy Pants
- Gray Velcro Walking Sneakers
- Gray Afro Curly Wig
- Round Reading Glasses
- Yellow Turtleneck
- Dark Brown Knit Long-Sleeve Polo Shirt
- Olive Green Corduroy Pants
- Brown Leather Braid Belt
- White Socks
- Brown Strap Sandals
- Canned Tuna
George St. Geegland and Gil Faizon look like two eccentric retirees who haven’t updated their Upper West Side wardrobes since 1978. Their aesthetic is built entirely around heavy knit layers, worn corduroy, orthopedic footwear, and unruly graying hair that instantly telegraphs their chaotic geriatric energy.
Because both outfits rely on off-the-rack garments rather than tailored fantasy pieces or armor, getting them right comes down to precise color choices and disheveled proportions. Everything should look slightly rumpled, ill-fitting, and pulled straight from a thrift store rack.
George St. Geegland’s Heavy Winter Layers
George’s outfit centers on an oversized camel wool top coat worn over a dark green turtleneck. The coat should hang loosely with broad shoulders, giving him a slouched, elderly posture. A snug green turtleneck creates a sharp contrast against the beige outer fabric at the neckline.
For the lower half, pair tan corduroy pants with gray velcro walking sneakers. The trousers work best when worn high on the waist, sitting slightly above the ankle to showcase the clunky, orthopedic look of the velcro straps.
George’s Hair and Eyewear
George wears a short white wig styled with a messy, thinning side part. Rather than brushing it neat, ruffle the fibers on top so it appears dry and lived-in.
His glasses are distinctively loud: red rectangular frames secured around his neck with a black cord retainer. When you aren’t wearing them directly on the bridge of your nose, let them dangle against the green turtleneck.
Gil Faizon’s Layered Polo and Corduroys
Gil’s wardrobe relies on an odd combination of clashing textures and colors. Start with a bright yellow turtleneck as the base, then layer a dark brown knit long-sleeve polo shirt directly over it. Leave the polo’s collar unbuttoned so the yellow turtleneck collar remains visible at the throat.
His pants are olive green corduroy, cinched tight with a brown braided leather belt. Gil wears his trousers pulled noticeably high, creating an awkward, boxy silhouette that matches his nervous shuffling.
Gil’s Sandals, Wig, and Glasses
Gil’s footwear is one of the most recognizable visual gags of his outfit: brown strap sandals worn over thick white socks. Pull the socks up cleanly so the contrast against the dark brown straps and olive hem stands out clearly.
Finish Gil with a tight, rounded gray afro curly wig and small round reading glasses. Unlike George’s red frames, Gil’s wire or dark round frames sit low on his nose, framing his perpetually bewildered expression.
The Tuna Sandwich Prop
No Too Much Tuna costume works without the prank itself. While carrying an ordinary tin of canned tuna offers an easy visual cue, constructing a faux sandwich sells the gag immediately. Carve a thick block of upholstery foam into a towering three-inch mound, coat it in textured grayish-pink paint to mimic tuna salad, and press it between two oversized slices of faux white bread secured with giant toothpicks.
